My grandma

Most of you probably know how close I've been to my grandmother. She was more than just my grandma, she was my second mom, my friend, and the person that gave me strength when I needed it the most. She was always there for me to give me advise and hold my hand through the toughest times of my life. In early spring of 2007, she was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer (stomach cancer) and had a surgery soon after where her entire stomach was removed. After that, she went through a extensive chemo therapy. She was very strong and seemed to be recovering quite well. She managed to go on the vacation of her life, a three week tour through China. Soon after, she came to my graduation ceremony in Chicago. I was so happy to have her there because I had accomplished a big capstone in my life and she was able to witness it and celebrate with her. Shortly after her visit to the U.S., the doctors found that the cancer had spread basically all across her organs. I dropped everything and went home for Christmas to spend as much time as possible with her.
To all of my friends in Germany: I know some of you were upset that I didn't tell you I was home. I would have loved to see you but this time was purely meant to be for my family and I know you understand that!
I had the most wonderful Christmas with all of my family. But when it was time to leave, it was the hardest time in my life because I had to say goodbye to my grandma. We were hoping it wouldn't be the last time. The last words my grandma said was that I shouldn't worry because she would beat the cancer. At the time, I knew she was right. I was wrong. On April 29th, 2008, she passed away in the hospital (Canstatt KH).
Losing my grandmother was the most shocking experience I have ever experienced. I had never lost a person that was so close to my heart before and I am still somewhat in denial about it. There are times when I want to pick up the phone and call her to tell her about something that happened to me. But I can't. I am having a really hard time talking about her death because I still wish that it didn't happen. I think about her every single day and I can't believe that she is not among us anymore.

I want to thank all of you that have been here for me during this difficult time. To my German friends, I know that you thought of me the entire time and I am SO grateful to have you as my friends because I know that, even though I am thousands of miles away, I can count on you to be here for me! You called and sent me very thoughtful letter that I appreciate very much! I love you all!!